Thursday, February 25, 2010

Moment Of Silence...

It’s a sad day here at the news desk of the Entertainment Guru. As soon as the news of his disappearance was released, I think most of us knew how this would end. It was announced today that Andrew Koenig was found dead in a park in Vancouver. For those of that know who Koenig was, he was a supporting actor on the 80’s sitcom Growing Pains. He played Kirk Cameron’s best friend on the show. He had one of the most original characters name ever. He was Sylvester Stabbone. Because as his character said “My father really liked Rocky”. But his character was not known as Sylvester, he was known simply…. As Boner. He was one of the stereotype characters that you have seen a 1000 times. The simple minded best friend but in the end, he was a close confident to the main character. Koenig wasn’t known for anything other then playing Boner and his father being Chekov from the original Star Trek series. It’s a sad day when anyone takes their own life. Andrew Koenig wasn’t famous. Do people know who he was? Of course they do. But just like millions of people he suffered from depression. He thought no one loved him. I watched the press conference (or as Nancy Grace referred to it as a “Presser”) with his parents. It’s never easy to watch a parent dealing with the death of a child, especially when they took their own life. So all I can do is say a moment of silence for everyone who knows someone who has fought depression.

The Boycott Edition

I am starting a boycott that I want everyone to help me with. This is a very serious issue to me. Everyone needs to boycott the fast food restaurant “Taco Bell”. I am boycotting the restaurant and ask you to do it too. This boycott will continue until they stop airing the rapping Charles Barkley commercials. Cause those commercials certainly don’t rock.

Someone needs to tell Liam Neeson that it is no longer the 1980’s. Not only does he appear in the remake of the A-Team, but also in the remake of “Clash Of The Titans”. I am going to refer to this summer as the Summer of the Return of 1980’s. In addition to those, we also get retelling of both The Karate Kid and Nightmare On Elm Street. Oh wait that’s right we also get the Sequel to Wall Street. Cause after all “Money Never Sleeps”.

I recently had my back turned on the TV and heard a commercial that started “Join John Cusack in the biggest movie of all time” and I turned around to see a commercial for “2012”. Admittedly I was disappointed cause I thought it was a commercial for his next movie “Hot Tub Time Machine”. When I heard there was a movie called “Hot Tub Time Machine” I was disappointed at first cause I said to myself “I want to watch that but I am not going to wait till 3 a.m. to turn on Skin-a-max!” Only to find out it was a legit movie. Phew!

Movie Cast of the Week: This probably won’t be a weekly feature but I thought I would call extra attention to the cast of the movie “Takers”. This is a who’s who of film making. And by film making I mean…. Matt “I can only do Heist Movies now” Dillion, Hayden “Whiney Nooooooooooo!” Christensen and Chris Brown. I am pretty sure I saw Robin Givens in the trailer too. Now doesn’t that sound like a quality cast to you? Me Neither!

This week’s number one movie is “Shelter Island”. I read something that said Martin Scorese’s next movie will be based off of Facebook. I have no comments other then this. Entertainment Guru’s current status… will not be seeing this movie.

Join me next week when I make my Oscar Predictions here on the Entertainment Guru page

Thursday, February 18, 2010

The "Not too fat to Fly" edition

I finally got a chance to listen to new version of "We are the World" for Haiti and I have to say... not impressed. I admit, I am not the hippest person in the world so I think I was able to pick out like five voices and accuratetly said who it was. But really? Adding a rap modernizes it? If thats the case, give me some good old Huey Lewis and the News and Hall with Oates! I know their hearts are in the right places, but couldn't we have just written a new song to use instead of touching a classic? Do you know why very few karaoke bars have "Thriller" available for karaoke? They don't want to see it killed. Sadly... I have seen it done at karaoke... and after I post this, I will have my moment of silence....

According to a major airline, film director Kevin Smith is "too fat to fly". I work in a very tourist-y place and I see people that are clearly too fat to even walk from attraction to attraction. So how did they get there? By car? Clearly not. So they had to fly. And Kevin Smith might be large, but I see atleast ten people a day that are much larger and more morbidly obese then him. And the airline is the one looking bad in all this.

I dont know if you have noticed, but Avatar isn't the number one box office movie anymore. In fact, for two weeks in a row it hasn't been. And I am here to gloat? No. I am not. First, Dear John beat it. Then last week it was Valentine's Day, the movie. I haven't seen either, or Avatar for that matter. I do find it shocking though. First off, War movies since 9/11 have been smashed here in the US. Not one movie featuring a war has been good, even with big names attached to it. So the fact Dear John beat Avatar is pretty amazing. Great piece of trivia.... what movie beat Titanic to reclaim number one at the box office? Ironically it was during my 21st birthday week... so your welcome. :)

I find it weird that Channing Tatum didn't almost do the glorious movie "GI Joe" cause he didn't want to do a war movie... then turned around... and did a movie about a soldier going off to... war.... irony?

And the answer is..... LOST IN SPACE!

Friday, February 12, 2010

The Sports and Political Edition

The world can breath easily. MTV recently announced that the Blockbuster TV show "Jersey Shore" has been renewed. Cause there is nothing cooler then people giving themselves nicknames. Does that mean I am the "Anti-Situation"?

I have figured out how the USA can get out of the debt that we have been in for a while. There is talk of doing a sequel to a little independent film that came out recently. It's called "Avatar". Ever hear of it? Well, my idea to save the USA is to have our govermnent co-produce Avatar 2. All money goes to fixing our national debt. It is bound to work!

Today is the start of the Winter Olympics. What am I looking forward to the most? The end of the Winter Olympics!

There is a commercial airing on ESPN talking about the rookie in Nascar that is so anticiapated despite the fact she has never ran a lap. It's Danica Patrick. Here's my issue with her hype.... she won one race in Formula One. In Japan. When no one of the big people were racing that event. So what? She is a woman racing. I think she is ALL HYPE. Sorry.... she is more famous for her Go commercials then anything else.

Congratulations to the Super Bowl Champions, the New Orleans Saints. I called it, for the record. I kinda almost got the score right too. I will take credit for that too.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

The "We will not mention Avatar by name once" edition

My last words weeks ago was Conan Got Screwed. It got me thinking. Remember back in the 90's the last time there was a fight for the Tonight Show between Leno and David Letterman. Letterman got painted as the bad guy. It looks like all along it was Leno. I know for a fact I will not be watching his show anymore. I used to support him but the Entertainment Guru is on Team Coco now!

Someone needs to tell people at Entertainment Tonight that Sarah Palin (politics) and Levi Johnston (Unwed Baby Daddy) are not entertainment figures. I can atleast see Tiger Woods and all the talk of his scandal appearing on both Legit News programs and making the rounds of the Entertainment news too. But nothing Palin or Playgirl Levi has ever done has screamed entertainment to me. Atleast putting Kevin Federline on made some sense. He was once an entertainer. Albeit a back up dancer, but atleast that was good enough to get Britney's attention back in the day.

Did anyone think watching the Screen Actors Guild Awards and the Golden Globes like they were watching the same show? It was like a carbon copy of the shows. And with the Academy Awards coming up soon, I am sure we will see a surprise here and there, but for the most part I predict the same. I will be back in time for the Oscars to do my full predictions by the way.

And speaking of predictions, tomorrow is the Super Bowl so it is only fair that the Entertainment Guru predicts..... Brett Favre retires! Again! For the 4th time. But on a serious note... Saints 34. Colts 31.